The Life I Live

Goodbye blogger!

2009-11-20T21:28:00.000-05:00

I think my blogging days have come to an end...I will be following all of you just have lost the interest....you can find me at Facebook however!!

Mariah being cute

2009-06-20T19:57:00.003-04:00

Just a video of Mariah being goofy...making up her own song on a beautiful spring day!

Tricia :)

Got creative today

2009-05-31T19:10:00.006-04:00

I felt like doing something creative and relaxing today...so I painted some wood picture frames. I used to paint stuff all the time before the little ones started to join the family! I miss it...hope I can keep it up once baby boy shows up...at least on some "me time" if that ever happens. Anyway, below are the 4 frames I did today...enjoy!! (They are not the best pics...my camera is being weird)

One for a photo of Mariah

One for of a photo of baby boy...when he comes!

One for a photo of both Gifts

One for a photo of my fabulous husband

Tricia :)

Mariah's 4th Birthday

2009-05-17T20:58:00.004-04:00

Here are some pics of Mariah's 4th birthday. I can't believe she is 4 already! Where does the time go?

Most of my pics are on facebook...so go there and view them all...if you are not a friend you can become one but you should be able to see the photos either way.

Have a good week!

Baby boy is growing great. Can't wait for him to be here so my bladder and insides get a little break from the boxing and kicking matches. I will keep you up to date!

Tricia :)

It's a BOY!!

2009-04-14T13:26:00.005-04:00

For those who have not heard...we are having a boy!! All of us are very excited! Mariah took a few days to get used to the fact that she was not getting the sister she asked for but she is happy about the baby boy now!

Below are some recent pics of fun times!

We visited Chucky Cheese while at my parents in March

Mariah's favorite friend Bob the Builder

And now for some video of the final break into the great outdoors...spring is attempting to make an entrance in these parts. Mariah wanted to sing this song for Grandma but you can all enjoy too (turn up the volume a bit...she sings quietly).

Have a super week!

Tricia :)

Good stuff to read

2009-03-06T11:24:00.002-05:00

Ok...I have been following this blog for some time. This post is a really good one! This is what our country needs for sure! Read it when you have time...worth the few minutes.

Tricia :)

Vacation Pictures...FINALLY!

2009-03-04T16:07:00.013-05:00

Ok, so I got myself together (after a cold that lasted a week and a half) and finally got the pictures organized. So...below are some of the best ones and an explanation of each. Enjoy!!!

Mom, Mariah and me waiting for
the train in Busch Gardens

I love vacation!!!! You do to...don't you?

All the "kids" posing at Sea World
(a little cold that day)

By far her favorite ride at Busch Gardens
(she has the brown GAP sweatshirt on)

Danielle and Mariah being
"Polar Bears" in Sea World

This was a HUGE jungle gym that went
REALLY high. Mariah LOVED it!!
(she is in there somewhere)

She met a new friend
(she loves all the characters...not scared at all)

All the girls posing on Shamu

The whole family (including Grandma and Grandpa Murdock)

Four Generations

One last picture but first an explanation. We spent most of the time...well, when we were not hopping around Florida...at my Grandparents house. They have a lot of really neat pictures that have been hanging in their house for years. This last picture is actually a picture of a picture. See if you can guess who it is!

Who am I?

Hope that satisfied for now! We had so much fun and I want to go back now seeing how it is still only 30 degrees here in PA!! Warm Florida sounds really nice right now!

Tricia :)

We have a winner!

2009-02-23T11:51:00.006-05:00

Ok, so not to many of you loverly people decided to participate but those who did...thanks and it was fun to remember!

The winner is Anne. It has nothing to do with the extra point she claimed (however that was good). We just chose her memory as the best one. Thanks to everyone who celebrated my 100th post with this fun memory game.

Anne, just email me your address and I will send you a little something soon!

Tricia :)

Just a side note: The comment that my sister wrote was very close to winning...reason I decided not to choose her is because I did not want to show favorites...her being my sis and all! Love you Kate!

100th Post

2009-02-15T20:20:00.002-05:00

Ok, so here I am...finally! As far as pictures go, still not done getting those sorted. So that will have to wait!

How do you like the new layout? I do live in a cheerio and peanut butter and jelly world so that is "The Life I Live."

As for the promise of giveaways. I have been thinking through this one. I have decided what to do.

Oh, did you want to know? Here you go...in order to win the prize (to be announced what that will be), you need to post a comment on this post. Simple...not quite! The comment must contain an interesting story about me. How you know me. How we met. Something goofy I did when we used to hang out. Anything like that.

I will leave it open until next week, Sunday at 8:30 pm. You have until then to try to win. I will, along with "my people" (Jeremy), decide which is the most interesting and announce it next week in a new post!

So, have fun and may the best man or woman win!!!

Tricia :)

Some vacation fun!

2009-02-08T17:21:00.005-05:00

Ok, I said I would do this like 2 weeks ago but I lost track of time. Jeremy got a nasty cold as soon as we got home and is just now feeling ok. Anyway...here are some of the pictures from Florida. I will get some more up soon.

Incidentally....I will be having a give away during the next post because it will be my 100th post. So, be looking for some fun giveaways and such next time I show up!

Now for the pictures!!!

Mariah on one of her favorite rides at Busch Gardens

Taking a "ride" on the turtle at Busch Gardens

Shamu...this was a cool show at Sea World

Ok, so I will be back soon with more to show you. Just didn't want you to think I forgot!

Tricia :)

We are back

2009-01-24T20:07:00.000-05:00

Just a brief note to say....WE ARE HOME! Not very excited about it though. Even though it was in the low 60's all week...that really beats the freezing temps at home.

New plan...moving to FLORIDA!!

More to come in a few days....after I get back into the groove!

Tricia :)

Be back in a week

2009-01-15T14:41:00.003-05:00

We are off to FLORIDA for a whole week starting Saturday. CAN NOT WAIT FOR SUN!! It is less then 20 degrees here today and I just want warmth. So, when we return I will again post some fun! Sorry for lack of post....I have been feeling rather eh with this first half of the pregnancy.

I am almost 10 weeks in so hopefully in a few weeks I will get some energy back. Saw the doctor yesterday and he said all things are fine. I will update you more later!!

Tricia :)

Our New Business

2009-01-06T15:40:00.002-05:00

Well, I am hear to announce the launch of a website for the business that Jeremy and I started working in about a year ago. We are independent representatives for a company that offers services for all your communication and entertainment needs. Go here to see the website and see how we can save your family money on your services today.

Have a super week!

Tricia :)

National Skating Month-January

2009-01-02T11:57:00.003-05:00

Ok, so January kind of snuck up on me. This month we will be celebrating skating. It is National Skating Month. Now, for those who live in a warm climate...regular roller skates will do. For those who are cold like us...I guess we will have to do the ice skating thing. Either way, skating is the name of the game! Hope you have fun!

We had a good time over Christmas with Jeremy's family. Always nice to get away. We are most excited about our trip to Florida in 15 days!!!! Can't not wait for the sun and fun!

Have a super month. Talk to you soon.

Tricia :)

I have decided to make this the last of my monthly holidays. I am...well...not wanting to do it anymore...so there!!

What is the hardest thing to clean in the kitchen?

2008-12-18T22:00:00.000-05:00

COCOA POWDER!!! Holy Cow!! Write this down...DO NOT spill cocoa powder in your kitchen! It is VERY hard to clean up. Oh, and whatever you use to clean it up...yeah...you have to clean that too! Wow, what a night I had. Glad that is over.

Anyway, on to the real reason for this post. I went to my first baby doctor appointment today. We are due to have Baby Knapp on August 14. So excited!!!

So, how are all of you? Doing well I hope. If we don't chat before, have a wonderful and blessed Christmas with your families.

Tricia :)

Early Christmas present

2008-12-10T11:20:00.002-05:00

We got an early Christmas present in our house....I am pregnant!! We are so excited. Of course Mariah is constantly talking about being the big sister and having a baby in the house. She says good morning to the belly every morning and even gives kisses. I know it will wear off soon when she realizes baby has 9 months until he/she comes. Oh well, for now we will just rejoice in our early gift from God!!

Just wanted to share! Hope you are all doing well.

Tricia :)

National Tie Month-December

2008-12-01T09:00:00.000-05:00

It is December...the last month of the year. Can you believe 2008 is almost over? Where did it go?!?! Anyway, this month we celebrate the tie. I don't where one...ever...but for those who do, enjoy this fun time.

It was a toss between this an Choose a Summer Camp Month...I only chose this because it is more likely that I will be wearing a tie this month then choosing a camp. I am almost 29 years old and I don't think any camp will allow me to come and join in the fun unless I actually was a counselor.

Anyhoo...have fun all you tie wearing dudes out there!!

Side note: If you are looking for a good camp...maybe for your kids...or you if you are into that kind of thing...I suggest New Life Island. My sister and brother-in-law are on staff there (he is the activity director and she works in the kitchen). It is an AWESOME camp and is a great place to send your kids. Super awesome stuff to do...and more importantly, a Christ-centered environment! Go here to get more information!!

Tricia :)

Things I am thankful for...

2008-11-26T11:18:00.002-05:00

I got this off a friends blog. You do yours and let me know on a comment.

1. Our awesome God
2. Jeremy...my amazing husband
3. Mariah...our super great daughter
4. My two great sisters, Danielle and Kate
5. My parents
6. Gummy Candy
7. A roof over my head
8. Pizza...only $8 at Walmart...very good buy, very good taste
9. My job
10. My bed
11. Brownies...making those in a few minutes...YUM
12. Pay Day
13. Eyes that work
14. Warm blankets
15. My favorite sweatshirt
16. Friends
17. The steakhouse burger at Burger King....wow...very good
18. Grandparents
19. My church family
20. Health

How about you?

New blog look...and other musings

2008-11-17T21:06:00.003-05:00

I have a new look and name. I thought it was about time!! So, enjoy this for the winter....which around here will be half the year!!

I am realizing that I do not blog much anymore. Not sure what that is all about. I think maybe I was having fun for awhile and lost some interest. Either way, I will try to make it more regular.

So...how about a family update?!

Mariah is doing well. I can't believe she will be 4 in May. It seems like just yesterday she was born and now I have a almost 4 year old. My Mom always told me that this would happen but I think until it does...you don't really believe it. She is always doing something new...always testing the boundaries. I will admit that this is fun...most of the time. Sometimes I struggle with where to put a boundary and how to keep it without alot of argument but...well, I am learning new stuff too.

Jeremy is great! I have really fallen in love with him again over this last 2 years with all the surgeries and stuff I have gone through. He has been an amazing support. I would not have made it without him and Mariah to make me smile when it was tough. I love him with all my heart! Thanks hunny for being the amazing man and father that you are!! I can't wait for the rest of our life together!

I am doing good too! I am finally done with surgeries...for now I guess. My eyes are improving all the time and I am so thankful to God that I can see. It is a real gift to have eyes that work and I have really come to know that this year. I had 5 teeth (3 wisdom teeth and 2 bad molars) pulled this last month and that was really a great experience...well...as great as that can be. I had almost no pain and it healed very quickly.

We as a family are really looking forward to some great stuff this year. First, January 17 we are going on our first family vacation...at least first one where we are flying. We are headed to Florida for a whole week...with the rest of my family...for a fun time together! Can't wait!!

Also, we are going to be trying for baby #2 so hopefully that will happen this year. I am ready...beyond ready...to add more little people to this house. So...hopefully I will have fun news in a few months!!

Anyway, that is all for now! Hope and pray all of you are doing well! Thanks for stopping by.

Tricia :)

National Peanut Butter Lovers Month-November

2008-11-03T13:03:00.002-05:00

I do so apologize...I am behind by a few days. Wow, November already!!

So, this month we celebrate the love of Peanut Butter. I must say that I have a love for peanut butter...especially when it is inside of chocolate! SO, enjoy the peanut butter lovlyness this month. Have yourself a daily pb & j or maybe a daily Reese! Anyway, enjoy and do tell of all the peanut butter fun on a comment!

Tricia :)

Pumpkin Fun!!!

2008-10-22T15:00:00.002-04:00

Mariah and I carved our pumpkins today. I did most of the work but she volunteered to do the messy part...guts and seeds!! Anyway, we had fun! I did not get any progressive pictures but below are the ones of the finished product.

Mariah and her doggy pumpkin

Mommy's silly face pumpkin

Halloween Fun!

2008-10-22T14:55:00.003-04:00

Everyone WATCH OUT

There is a Ninja loose in the area

She is quite strong and scary

Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!

Mariah's New Toy

2008-10-22T14:52:00.004-04:00

So, Mariah got a gift of money from her great grandma and so she picked out this lovely gift. She was very excited...she paid for it all by herself and was so proud of herself for picking out such a wonderful item.

Photo Challenge

2008-10-09T22:59:00.003-04:00

Ok, so I am taking a challenge presented on a friends blog. You need to post the sixth picture from the sixth file in your picture file on your computer. That is it...so post away. Mine is below! Leave me a comment if you are going to do it and I will check yours out!

This is the closet where our washer and dryer are.
I took the photo before we moved in!

Tricia :)

Ladies Retreat 2008

2008-10-02T23:08:00.007-04:00

Last weekend we had a Ladies Retreat for our church that was loads of fun. We dealt with the subject of having a Mary heart in a Martha world...which basically means we need to put intimacy with the Lord above all the business in our lives. Great topic...much learning...much fun!! We were up until 4 am just talking on Friday night (breakfast was at 8:30). We were SO tired Saturday but it was a great experience!

Below are some pictures of the weekend. Enjoy!!

All the ladies

Gloria
*We have bible study at her house each Monday*

Ali
*I co-run the Kidz Zone in church with this lovely lady*

Gwen
*We laughed a lot on Friday night*

Darlene
*Pepsi got us all through to 4 am*

Me
*I had fun...this was Saturday afternoon...do I look tired? I did not do my hair so instead I donned this lovely hat...doesn't it bring out my...total lack of style!?!?*

Tricia :)

My desires...becoming His

2008-10-02T14:19:00.003-04:00

I have been spending my devotion time with the Lord learning how to pray. I have been going through "Becoming A Woman Of Prayer" by Cynthia Heald. Today I was learning about God's desires in relation to how I am praying to Him. This quote below really stuck out at me and I wanted to share it with you. I pray that it opens your eyes and hearts as much as it did mine!

Initially, I responded to His call to delight in Him to ensure the fulfillment of His promise to give me the desires of my heart. I had no idea that He would give me a new heart (Jer. 24:7). I didn't know that He would begin working in me to reproduce His own heart. When I turned to Him, I found that He Himself is my very great reward (Gen. 15:1). He is not, as I had supposed, the means to my end. He is the desire of my heart.

Jennifer Kennedy Dean

Tricia :)

National Popcorn Poppin' Month-October

2008-10-01T08:00:00.000-04:00

It is that time again...when we celebrate a holiday for the month. There were so many choices to make but this one just popped off the page at me (get it...popped...popcorn...HAHAHAHA). Anyway, we celebrate National Popcorn Poppin' Month for October. So...go get some popcorn and pop it. Have fun, be creative. You could make popcorn balls for the Halloween guests. You could have movie night...every night!!! Whatever you choose, try to enjoy the kernel that is popcorn...and pop it!!!

Tricia :)

Watch before Voting!!

2008-09-29T18:07:00.004-04:00

I don't usually do the "politics thing" but this video is a MUST SEE before voting in November. I really think we need to make a wise decision at the voting polls and this may just help you do that!

Tricia :)

Update: They tried to take this off the YouTube network for copyright reasons...didn't work!! Anyway, I updated the link just in case it was not working well!

So cute

2008-09-25T23:38:00.003-04:00

This has been on YouTube for a little while but I had to post it here. It is Mariah singing and my sister and brother-in-law's place. Doug taped it on his computer and posted on YouTube. Just go to the link on the word "this" and you can see it on Doug's YouTube Channel. Enjoy!!

Tricia :)

PS- This is my 80th post...just in case you care!!

Bad news...doing ok with it

2008-09-23T22:46:00.004-04:00

Well, I went to an oral surgeon today to consult about some bad teeth. Looks like I will be having surgery (again) on October 24 to remove 5 (yes that is five) teeth from my mouth. I have 3 wisdom teeth that are becoming a problem and 2 teeth that had previous root canals and have fallen apart.

Well, I knew things were not good but I was not ready for this. Plus the out-of-pocket cost is very high and a bit scary. I have to say that I did not have a good reaction to this or what I was facing financially and physically (sorry Mom).

Things have changed tonight though. I had a few moments on the way to the bank and to pick up some rolls for dinner tomorrow. I was alone...just me and God. I didn't really say much to Him, I just kind of listened. I came to the conclusion that although this REALLY STINKS, I am going to choose to be ok with it and let Him work out the details.

Why am I telling you this? Because I need prayer. I really want to allow God to work through this...allow Him to have the control and just wait and listen to His plan. I can't change it...it has to be. So...like I had to do with all the other surgeries...I am choosing to be ok with it. I don't think I will ever like it, ever want it...but I WILL be ok with it.

I don't have a choice, really. I know that we all have the choice to be selfish and think "Why me" but as a follower of Christ, that is not an option for me.

So, please pray that will continue to be my outlook. It will be a daily thing but I know in His strength I can do it!

Thanks for listening (reading)!

Tricia :)

Update: I posted this last night just to ask for prayer and let you know what I wanted to do about it. Well, this morning God provided!! I got a call from someone and all the money we need to pay for the procedure is coming in the mail. The coolest things is that God had this money set aside before we even knew we needed it. Praise our amazing God for what He has done! I owe Him all the praise and thanks, and of course thank you to the special ones who God is using to help us! AMEN!!!!

Thoughts on God

2008-09-17T23:05:00.002-04:00

Please go here and read this post. I found this blog through another blog I follow and read this post today. I was very inspired and thought you would like to be too. It is a profound look at how we view our God and life with Him. Good stuff!!

Tricia :)

Can you survive???

2008-09-16T22:12:00.003-04:00

I saw this on a friends blog and had to put it on mine. Enjoy ladies!!

THE NEXT SURVIVOR SERIES

Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and

3 kids each for six weeks.

Each kid will play

two sports

and either take music

or dance classes. They will also attend cubs, brownies, sea cadets or similar.

There is no fast food.

Each man must:

take care of his 3 children,

keep his assigned house clean,

correct all homework,

and complete science projects,

also, cook, do laundry,

and pay a list of 'pretend' bills

with not enough money.

In addition, each man

will have to budget in money

for groceries each week.

Each man

must remember the birthdays

of all their friends and relatives,

and send cards out

on time--no emailing.

Each man must also

take each child to a doctor's appointment,

a dentist appointment

and a haircut appointment.

He must make

one unscheduled and inconvenient

visit per child

to A & E

He must also

make gingerbread men or choc chip cakes

for a social function.

Each man will be responsible for

decorating his own assigned house,

planting flowers outside

and keeping it presentable

at all times.

The men will only

have access to television

when the kids are asleep

and all chores are done.

The men must

shave their legs,

wear makeup daily,

adorn themselves with jewelery,

wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes,

keep fingernails polished

and eyebrows groomed.

During one of the six weeks,

the men will have to endure severe abdominal pain, persistent lower back aches,

and have extreme, unexplained mood swings, but never once complain or

slow down from other duties.

They must attend

weekly school meetings, concerts & plays, church, and find time

at least once a week, to spend the afternoon

in the park or a similar setting.

They will need to

read a book to the kids

each night and in the morning,

feed them, dress them,

brush their teeth and

comb their hair by 7:00 am.

A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information:

each child's birthday,

height, weight,

shoe size, clothes size, teachers name, best friends name and doctor's name.

Also the child's weight at birth,

time of birth,

and length of labor,

each child's favorite color,

middle name,

favorite snack,

favorite song,

favorite drink,

favorite toy,

biggest fear and

what they want to be when they grow up.

The kids vote them off the island

based on performance.

The last man wins only if...

he still has enough energy

to be intimate with his spouse

at a moment's notice.

If the last man does win,

he can play the game over and over

and over again for the next 18-25 years

eventually earning the right

To be called Mother!

Tricia :)

The Room

2008-09-15T21:46:00.002-04:00

17-year-old Brian Moore had only a short time to write something for a class.. The subject was what Heaven was like. "I wowed 'em," he later told his father, Bruce. "It's a killer. It's the bomb. It's the best thing I ever wrote." It also was the last.

Brian's parents had forgotten about the essay when a cousin found it while cleaning out the teenager's locker at Teary Valley High School. Brian had been dead only hours, but his parents desperately wanted every piece of his life near them-notes from classmates and teachers, his homework. Only two months before, he had handwritten the essay about encountering Jesus in a file room full of cards detailing every moment of the teen's life. But it was only after Brian's death that Beth and Bruce Moore realized that their son had described his view of heaven. "It makes such an impact that people want to share it. You feel like you are there." Mr. Moore said.

Brian Moore died May 27, 1997, the day after Memorial Day. He was driving home from a friend's house when his car went off Bulen-Pierce Road in Pickaway County and struck a utility pole. He emerged from the wreck unharmed but stepped on a downed power line and was electrocuted. The Moores framed a copy of Brian's essay and hung it among the family portraits in the living room. "I think God used him to make a point. I think we were meant to find it and make something out of it," Mrs. Moore said of the essay. She and her husband want to share their son's vision of life after death. "I'm happy for Brian. I know he's in heaven.! I know I'll see him"

Brian's Essay: The Room...

In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the room. There were no distinguishing features except for the one wall covered with small index card files. They were like the ones in libraries that list titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly endless in either direction, had very different headings.

As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one that read "Girls I have liked" I opened it and began flipping through the cards. I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names written on each one. And then without being told, I knew exactly where I was. This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my life. Here were written the actions of my every moment, big and small, in a detail my memory couldn't match. A sense of wonder and curiosity, coupled with horror, stirred within me as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content. Some brought joy and sweet memories; others a sense of shame and regret so intense that I would look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching.

A file named "Friends" was next to one marked "Friends I have betrayed." The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird "Books I Have Read," "Lies I Have Told," "Comfort I have Given," "Jokes I Have Laughed at." Some were almost hilarious in their exactness: "Things I've yelled at my brothers." Others I couldn't laugh at: "Things I Have Done in My Anger", "Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents." I never ceased to be surprised by the contents.

Often there were many more cards than I expected. Sometimes fewer than I hoped I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived. Could it be possible that I had the time in my years to fill each of these thousands or even millions of cards? But each card confirmed this truth. Each was written in my own handwriting. Each signed with my signature. When I pulled out the file marked "TV Shows I have watched", I realized the files grew to contain their contents. The cards were packed tightly, and yet after two or three yards, I hadn't found the end of the file. I shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of shows but more by the vast time I knew that file represented.

When I came to a file marked "Lustful Thoughts," I felt a chill run through my body. I pulled the file out only an inch, not willing to test its size and drew out a card. I shuddered at its detailed content. I felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded. An almost animal rage broke on me. One thought dominated my mind: No one must ever see these cards! No one must ever see this room! I have to destroy them!" In insane frenzy I yanked the file out. Its size didn't matter now. I had to empty it and burn the cards. But as I took it at one end and began pounding it on the floor, I could not dislodge a single card. I became desperate and pulled out a card, only to find it as strong as steel when I tried to tear it.

Defeated and utterly helpless, I returned the file to its slot. Leaning my forehead against the wall, I let out a long, self-pitying sigh. And then I saw it.. The title bore "People I Have Shared the Gospel With." The handle was brighter than those around it, newer, almost unused. I pulled on its handle and a small box not more than three inches long fell into my hands. I could count the cards it contained on one hand. And then the tears came. I began to weep. Sobs so deep that they hurt. They started in my stomach and shook through me. I fell on my knees and cried. I cried out of shame, from the overwhelming shame of it all. The rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. No one must ever, ever know of this room. I must lock it up and hide the key.

But then as I pushed away the tears, I saw Him. No, please not Him. Not here. Oh, anyone but Jesus. I watched helplessly as He began to open the files and read the cards. I couldn't bear to watch His response. And in the moments I could bring myself to look at His face, I saw a sorrow deeper than my own. He seemed to intuitively go to the worst boxes. Why did He have to read every one? Finally He turned and looked at me from across the room. He looked at me with pity in His eyes. But this was a pity that didn't anger me. I dropped my head, covered my face with my hands and began to cry again.

He walked over and put His arm around me.. He could have said so many things. But He didn't say a word. He just cried with me. Then He got up and walked back to the wall of files. Starting at one end of the room, He took out a file and, one by one, began to sign His name over mine on each card. "No!" I shouted rushing to Him. All I could find to say was "No, no," as I pulled the card from Him. His name shouldn't be on these cards.

But there it was, written in red so rich, so dark, so alive. The name of Jesus covered mine. It was written with His blood. He gently took the card back. He smiled a sad smile and began to sign the cards. I don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so quickly, but the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last file and walk back to my side. He placed His hand on my shoulder and said, "It is finished."

I stood up, and He led me out of the room. There was no lock on its door.. There were still cards to be written.

Tricia :)

New Job

2008-09-11T10:33:00.002-04:00

Ok, so I started my new job yesterday evening. I went in expecting to learn and maybe have a hard time adjusting. Not really...on both accounts! I can't say I didn't learn anything but they were totally unprepared for me to come in. The front end manager had no idea I was coming in...that started the evening off just great. Then, I was moved around quite a bit. I can't say I really had any real training last night. I was scheduled to be on until 10 but they were short handed last night (due to bad planning by our friend the front end manager) so I was sent home at 8:00.

Oh well, all in all it is going to be a good thing. I enjoy the fact that I have some time outside of the house. I will miss my little sweetie while I am gone but it is a good thing to be out alone. For all those mommies out there who get how I am feeling, say Amen!!

Well, off for a fun afternoon before starting work at 5:00. Let's just hope things are in order this evening...if not, I will at least be learning flexability!

Tricia :)

Parking for all

2008-09-07T17:42:00.002-04:00

Mariah likes to "park" her bike with the cars. We all have our transportation lined up...Mommy's, Mariah's and Daddy's. Thought it was cute, shared it with you. Enjoy!!

Tricia :)

My two favorite people

2008-09-07T17:38:00.003-04:00

I love these two! They are the light of my life. I was just outside watching them and thanking God for giving them to me. I appreciate every little thing and can't imagine my life without both of them in it. Can't wait to add more to the family and expand my love even more!

Tricia :)

Bug in a Rug

2008-09-07T17:35:00.003-04:00

Here is Mariah getting "snug as a bug in a rug" in our new sleeping bag. We got it for my ladies retreat that our church is having this month but we also have other retreats throughout the year so it will get much use from both Jeremy and me. Anyway, thought she looked cute!

Tricia :)

Family

2008-09-04T11:33:00.003-04:00

Here is a photo of my little family with my parents. I am so happy we were able to spend time together! Thanks Mom and Dad for a great weekend. See you in Florida!!!

Tricia :)

Fun Family Time

2008-09-04T10:55:00.019-04:00

We spent a majority of our fun time at Grandma and Grandpa's trailer in Hidden Valley. Mariah had a super time with all her grandma and grandpas and her aunts and uncles. Of course she was spoiled rotten by "her grandma" which is my mom. See pictures below. There are a few of the whole family too. We had Denise and Eric and Cassie and Scott and Anna there too!! Yeah for family time!!!

Mariah in the creek...with clothes on!

Uncle Doug joined the fun too!

Water balloon fight...I stayed dry somehow!

Family hang out time around the fire pit

The whole family! From left to right, top to bottom: Jeremy, Me, Kate, Morgan (Kate's best friend), Denise, Scott, Anna (Scott's wife), Eric, Dad, Danielle, Doug (Danielle's husband), Cassie, Mariah, Grandpa M, Mom, Grandma M

Tricia :)

Fun at Midway!!

2008-09-04T10:33:00.009-04:00

Well, as I said before we are back from our fun family weekend. We arrived in Jamestown about 10:30 pm on Friday so the fun began on Saturday morning at....MIDWAY!!! I remember this place when I was a kid, only it seemed so much smaller than I remembered. I guess growing up makes things seem different. Anyway, pictures are below of our, or Mariah's, fun day!!

Mariah loved the boats...this ride was the one she rode the most

Getting ready to ride the cars...another favorite

Getting ready for a train ride...with Grandma

Skee ball...a must at Midway

Everyone played games and Mariah got this!

We had to try the scooter cars...and we did a pretty good job
(with a little help from Midway helper man)

So, we had a great time that day. The whole weekend was great! Can't wait to be with everyone again in Florida in January!!

Tricia :)

We are home!

2008-09-02T21:14:00.001-04:00

Just a note to all my blogging friends, we are home from our Labor Day weekend fun! I will get on this week and post pictures and tell you about our fun weekend!

Tricia :)

National Potato Month-September

2008-09-01T08:00:00.001-04:00

Time to celebrate another monthly holiday. Nothing really jumped out at me from the list this month but this one will do. I like potatoes, you like potatoes, we all LOVE potatoes....so....let's celebrate them!!

Well, what can I say about the fabulous potato? I like them fried, I like them mashed, I like them toasted....I LOVE me some potatoes! So, enjoy this month and make some fabulous potatoes, however you like 'em cooked! Let me know what you think of potatoes, tell me any great recipes for potatoes....enjoy the potato this month!

Tricia :)

PS-I hope August was a HAPPY MONTH!!!

Something to ponder

2008-08-28T12:30:00.004-04:00

I got this from a friend's site. Check it out...and maybe come up with your own!

"If you were 20 (single and no baby) and money were not an object, what are five things that you would want to do in life?"

1. Spend some time in South Africa helping the churches there.
2. Go to Paris for some time and get cultured.
3. Maybe learn to cook so I might enjoy it.
4. Travel around the world.
5. Buy a nice house in a warm climate and have friends over all the time, a house like on The Notebook, just like that.

"If you were 60 (still no family concerns) and money were not an object, what are five things you would want to do? What accounts for the differences between the two lists?"

1. Have a house in a warm climate, maybe have friends living with me, same as above #5.
2. Help my church in anyway I could; money is no object so....
3. Have a house in Europe somewhere that I could go to with friends.
4. A live in nurse/caretaker that would help when I could not help myself anymore.
5. Buy a candy store and sell the candy for super cheap....but only to kids.

I think the only difference in my lists is age. I don't think anything else would change! This was harder than I thought it would be....I had to think! You would think with all the money you could want and no commitments (family anyway) you could come up with lots. I guess not...I am very happy with things as they are so maybe that is why it was so hard to come up with ideas.

Tricia :)

Labor Day weekend

2008-08-26T21:08:00.002-04:00

We will be off to Jamestown, NY for Labor Day weekend. Looking forward to some fun family time. Mom and Dad, Kate and her friend Morgan, Danielle and Doug, and my little fam will all be there. Of course we will be spread between in Grandma and Grandpa Murdock's and Denise and Eric's place but we will have fun together when we are not sleeping! So be looking for new pictures (on both blogs) after we get back on Tuesday! Can't wait to be with my family and make more memories!

Any of our Jamestown friends that read this....we are coming to your "neck of the woods" so we should get together one night up at the trailer park and roast some marshmellows around Grandpa's fire!!!

See you when we get back blogging friends!!

Tricia :)

Beautiful day....awesome God!

2008-08-19T14:51:00.002-04:00

I just wanted to check in and say hey to you all. We are having what should have been a rainy day that turned into a beautiful, sunny but cool day. What an awesome God we serve!

You should check out my other blog to see some of the cool things our God has created that I have posted up there. Some are man-made but still...it is all pictures I took myself outside in nature....or the nature that is my back yard. I am having a super time with this! It is so fun to take pictures and get the little details of things that I normally would just not even notice. It is also so awesome to see the details our God puts into His creation! I praise Him today for the details of life that I miss but He never forgets. And for providing when we think we can't make it. And for being who He is....my God and Saviour and Best Friend.

Have a great day!

Tricia :)

Feeling off today

2008-08-16T17:19:00.003-04:00

Do you ever have a day where you feel....off? That is me today.....I have these feelings of just wanting to pick of my precious family, whatever we can get in both cars, and skip town to start a new life. I know that makes no sense being that my husband has a job, we have a fabulous church family, and we know this is where God has us right now. But....there are days that are off.

I want to feel different, I want to be joyful...but instead I am choosing bumming. I am happy...with my family, with where God has us....but I still feel like something is missing. Maybe it is just that I need to be in the Word more. Maybe it is God doing something in our life that I can't see yet. Maybe I am coming up on my monthly "friend" and I just feel moody. Whatever the cause....it is what it is today.

So, tomorrow is the day we go and worship together with our church family. I hope these feelings go away with sleep tonight....but what if they don't? What do I do then?

I guess the answer should be obvious....I need to give it over to God. I need to get off myself and focus on what He wants....things that are lovely, things that are of good repute....but I find that difficult today.

So....I can't tell you what I will do next. I can tell you that I will be fine. I can tell you that my God is bigger than any feeling I have. I can tell you that whatever tomorrow brings....I will push through.

Thanks for listening!

Tricia :)

PS- Update: I am doing better now (7:45 pm). I just had to get it off my chest!

My new blog

2008-08-15T19:41:00.004-04:00

I have a new picture blog you can all check out! The name is Picture My World.
Enjoy!

Tricia :)

PS- There is a link for the page over to the right as well.

New blog gadgets

2008-08-14T13:17:00.005-04:00

Hey everyone! Just checking in to let you know to check out my new gadgets on the page. I have them all over the sides and bottom of the page. I will be adding more probably today so enjoy the random facts and fun games!!!

Tricia :)

PS- I added the sun at the top because we are lacking in the sun department today so I had to have it somewhere....when was summer supposed to be again???

An 80's Girl!

2008-08-11T19:24:00.029-04:00

YOU KNOW YOU GREW UP IN THE 80's OR EARLY 90's IF:

1. You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE"

2. You watched the Pound Puppies.

3. You can sing the rap to the "Fresh Prince of Bel Air" ...and can do the "Carlton."

4. Girls wore biker shorts under their skirts and felt stylishly sexy.

5. You yearned to be a member of the Baby-Sitters Club
and tried to start a club of your own.

6. You owned those lil' Strawberry Shortcake pals scented dolls.

7. You know that "WHOA" comes from Joey on Blossom

8. Two words: Hammer Pant

9. If you ever watched "Fraggle Rock"

10. You had plastic streamers on your handle bars... and "spokey- dokes" or playing cards on your spokes for that incredible sound effect

11. You can sing the entire theme song to "Duck Tales"
(Woo ooh!)

12. It was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.

13. You wore a ponytail on the side of your head.

14. You saw the original "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles"
on the big screen... and still know the turtles' names.

15. You got super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.

16. You made your mom buy one of those clips that would hold your shirt in a knot on the side.

17. You played the game "MASH" (Mansion, Apartment, Shelter, House)

18. You wore stonewashed Jordache jean jackets and were proud of it.

19. L.A. Gear... need I say more?

20. You wanted to change your name to "JEM" in Kindergarten (she's truly outrageous.)

21. You remember reading "Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing" and all the Ramona books.

22. You know the profound meaning of "WAX ON, WAX OFF"

23. You wanted to be a Goonie.

24. You ever wore fluorescent clothing (some of us... head-to-toe)

25. You can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his nose fell off and his cheeks shifted.

26. You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the only female Smurf.

27. You took lunch boxes to school... and traded
Garbage Pail Kids in the schoolyard.

28. You remember the CRAZE, then the BANNING of slap bracelets.

29. You still get the urge to say "NOT" after every sentence.

30. You remember Hypercolor t-shirts.

31. Barbie and the Rockers were your favorite band.

32. You thought She-Ra (Princess of Power!) and He-Man should hook up.

33. You thought your childhood friends would never leave because you exchanged handmade friendship bracelets.

34. You ever owned a pair of jelly shoes
(and, like, probably in neon colors, too!)

35. After you saw Pee-Wee's Big Adventure you kept saying "I know you are, but what am I?"

36. You remember "I've fallen and I can't get up"

37. You remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates.

38. You ever got seriously injured on a Slip and Slide.

39. You have ever played with a Skip-It.

40. You had or attended a birthday party at McDonalds.

41. You've gone through this nodding your head in agreement.

42. You remember Popples.

43. "Don't worry, be happy"

44. You wore like, EIGHT pairs of socks over tights with high top Reeboks.

45. You wore socks scrunched down (and sometimes still do... getting yelled at by "younger, hip" members of the family)

46. You remember boom boxes... and walking around with one on your shoulder like you were all that.

47. You remember watching both "Gremlins" movies.

48. You know what it meant to say "Care Bear Stare!!"

49. You remember watching "Rainbow Bright" and "My Little Pony Tales"

50. You thought Doogie Howser/Samantha Micelli was hot.

51. You remember Alf, the little furry brown alien from Melmac.

52. You remember New Kids on the Block when they were cool... and don't even flinch when people refer to them as "NKOTB".

53. You knew all the characters' names AND their life stories on
"Saved By The Bell," The ORIGINAL class.

54. You know all the words to Bon Jovi's SHOT THROUGH THE HEART

55. You just sang those words to yourself

56. You remember watching Magic vs. Bird.

57. Homemade Levi shorts (the shorter the better)

58. You remember when mullets were cool

59. You had a mullet!

60. You still sing "We are the World"

61. You tight rolled your jeans.

62. You owned a banana clip.

63. You remember "Where's the Beef?"

64. You used to (and probably still do) say "What you talkin' 'bout,Willis?

65. You had big hair and you knew how to use it.

66. You're still singing "Shot Through the Heart" in your head, aren't you?

Happy Anniversary!

2008-08-11T19:14:00.005-04:00

Today is my sister Danielle and her husband Doug's first wedding anniversary! YEAH, ONE YEAR!!! I am so happy for you guys. Hope you had a great day! Have fun celebrating over the weekend in your mini-vacation.

Tricia :)

Doctors, Doctors, and more Doctors

2008-08-04T17:25:00.002-04:00

Well, I just got home from yet another doctor's visit. This was to the one who did the first eye surgery...a follow-up. I am doing great and no need for any adjusting right now. Anything he would adjust would possibly make the areas that have already gotten used to the prisms in the glasses to change. SO...for now...we are staying as is! Which I am TOTALLY fine with...ready to be done with this going to the doctor thing.

Of course I am NOT done...that would never happen here. We have one doctor's visit to my regular doctor in October. We have 2 doctor's visits in November, one to the neurologist for a check-up on the head and one to the eye plastic surgeon for more follow-ups. Then of course their is the annual visit to the gyno for...well you know! So...I am far away from being done. At least the doctor from today says all is well until March.

Just an update...hope and pray you all have a great week!

Tricia :)

Our little baseball star

2008-08-01T19:54:00.009-04:00

Mariah and Daddy were out in the yard playing "baseball" and I got some pictures. Looks like we have a lefty in the family. However, as you will see, she bats both ways. We have a little leaguer with some major potential! Ok, we are a bit biased but I say she is pretty good for a 3 year old....you decided!

Our left handed batter...

...or is it right?

And now a little video...it is a bit long but she tries really hard...no sound because we got it with our digital camera, which doesn't have sound! If there are some grandparents out there (hint, hint) that would like to hear her as well as see her....you know what we need. :) She actually gets some good hits and she is a super thrower as well. Again..a bit biased. Most of the good hits came before I thought to get the camera. We will now have it outside at all times! Enjoy!!!!

Happiness Happens Month-August

2008-08-01T07:00:00.000-04:00

Ok people, just as the title says....HAPPINESS HAPPENS!! We can be happy...imagine that! So this month will be all about happiness...what makes us happy, choosing to be happy, sharing happiness to all you meet! So go out there and be happy for crying out loud. You have to...the month is all about it!

I had a couple of choices...one of which was Neurosurgery Outreach Month....something I am familiar with. However last month was a more serious subject so I decided to forgo that idea and go right to choosing happiness.

Make happiness happen this month....wherever you go!!!

Tricia :)

Sunday Evening Babbling

2008-07-20T23:08:00.010-04:00

So, it is Sunday evening...just after 11pm and I am up still. Not totally sure why but not really that tired so I thought I would post something. I am sure you are all tired of my last post with the "beautiful" pictures of my recovering eyes so....here is something else to look at.

I relearned something today....happiness is a choice. I had many opportunities to not be happy today, for whatever reason, but I decided to just let that go. I have discovered that I am a much more fun person to be around (of course me not having much of a choice in that) when I choose to be happy, regardless of a circumstance.

It was a BEAUTIFUL day here in PA. We had a church picnic after the service today at a local park. It is so much fun to be around people who are your friends outside of the "church" atmosphere...you know...in the "real world" outside. Our church is such a family and it is so awesome to just hang out with each other and encourage each other. Some time if you are in the Mt. Pocono, PA area you should come join us in our worship services. We really enjoy worshiping God together and I think you would find it refreshing.

Well, as my title says....I am just babbling tonight. Felt like getting some things out of my head and on "paper" or computer...whatever!

So, leave me a comment about your day...babble if you want...or don't. I just wanted to have something new on my blog page...and of course..."talking", whatever it's form, is something I love to do!! All the pictures I added are random and just for something cool to look at.

I just realized only 10 more days until the next monthly holiday post! I hope you are ready for more fun!! I know I am!

Until next time...I bid you farewell. Have a great week!

Tricia :)

Update

2008-07-14T22:10:00.005-04:00

I just had my doctor's appointment today for the post-op and my doctor said all is well. She removed the stitches and said I don't need to see her for 3-4 months. YIPEEE!!!

I am feeling GREAT! I have all my energy back and am seeing quite well (see photos: first I am not trying at all, second I am trying to lift my eyes). Thank you to all who have been praying.

Tricia :)

Chatting time

2008-07-12T18:07:00.004-04:00

Come join me here for some fun chatting. Just click on the "Download for free" button and follow the instructions. When you want to find me my nickname is "knappfam3." If you have a webcam and mic we can see each other too.

Tricia :)

Getting back to normal

2008-07-09T17:58:00.012-04:00

I am posting to let all you want to know how I am doing. I had surgery on June 25 to lift my eyelids. I only wish this was for aesthetic reasons....quite the contrary. I know some of you know but for those who do not, I had surgery January 17, 2007 to remove a brain tumor. This led to issues with my eyes due to the fact that a nerve was damaged. So the next surgery was to fix double vision and other eye issues (that was November of 2007). That was a very successful surgery and now I where prism glasses to correct what could not be fixed.

So, if you look below you will see the results (and I am still healing) of June 25th. The surgery involved the doctor inserting material that made it so my eyebrows do the work of the eyelids...being that the eyelids no longer work on their own. When I try to lift (using my eyelids) I get one result...a more open eye. But even without trying I can see great and they are open most of the way. God is so good (He always has been) and I am so thankful to Him that I am doing well and healing so fast.

I know that I have gone through this time for a reason. I am not sure what yet but the day I know...I will definitely share with you. If I don't find out until heaven then I can rejoice with Jesus there.

Again, thanks for your prayers and don't stop. Every day is a new day to celebrate. Hopefully soon we will have some other good news....but that will wait until then! :)

Trying to lift my eyes

Not trying to lift my eyes

Tricia :)

Stop the "if only"

2008-07-07T14:28:00.003-04:00

Go here and read something I think we all need to read. I think we need to be content where God has us and try to live a life that pleases Him...not "me." Hope it inspires you!

Tricia :)

Please read this!!

2008-07-01T13:39:00.004-04:00

Here is one way you can make a difference in some children's (and young adults) lives. Read this and then commit to helping or praying. God is so wise and allows things into our lives that help us to grow stronger. I hope this inspires you today!

Tricia :)

Total side note....this is my 50th post! Yippee!!!!

National Make A Differece To Children Month-July

2008-07-01T09:10:00.003-04:00

Yes, very long title. I decided to go with something serious this month. I think we can all do better by the kids in our lives...whether it means just saying I love you more or teaching them something to take them through life. Most importantly we can share Christ with them and draw them to Him through our example.

So, this month, tell your kids you love them more. Play with them more. If you kids are grown pray more. If you don't have kids...love and help the kids in your life or the ones you come in contact with this month....and beyond. They are the future (as they say) so let's help them make right choices to leave a legacy for Christ.

Ok, I am done on my soap box! See my favorite kid below!

Tricia :)

Home Recovering

2008-06-30T18:14:00.003-04:00

Hey all! Well, I am home recovering from surgery number 3 and doing well. I want to thank all of you who have been praying and I will keep you posted.

On another note, go here to read something I think we all need to read. I found this blog through another friends and have enjoyed his writings. He is a pastor in the Outer Banks and I think it is worth your time to read the blog.

Anyway, I will keep you posted on how I am feeling!

Tricia :)

Random Fun

2008-06-24T11:01:00.012-04:00

I just thought I would post some random pictures of the family from our most recent visits together.

Luis and Baby Gabriel
This is my sister-in-law, Jenn, husband and their son.
We were with them all this last weekend.

Mariah in Aunt Becky and Dan's pool this past weekend

Mariah and Uncle Doug
This is Danielle's husband

Mariah with Aunt DeDe (Danielle)

Grandpa, are you sleeping?
Mariah with my Dad

Mariah and Grandma O.

My sister Kate

My nephew Gabriel
I love this little boy!

Tricia :)

The Three Sisters together again!

2008-06-19T11:01:00.014-04:00

Yesterday Mariah, Kate, and I went up to New Life Island for a fun day together. My sister Danielle lives there with her husband, Doug who is on staff. Kate is in town for a wedding this weekend so we decided to make a day of it and spend time together....the three of us (and Mariah). We had a fun day! Enjoy the pics....some may not make sense to you but if you knew us....well you would get it!

Danielle getting her hair dyed...after all...that is why Kate comes (just kidding!)

Danielle (a.k.a Foil Head) playing while she waits

Me getting my haircut...Thanks Kate!!

The Three Sisters

Ok, here comes the...interesting part!!

Laughing REALLY hard...

...as Kate read this book

You can only imagine....SOOO FUNNY!!

This may help you to imagine!!

So, we had a really great day...just hanging out! I miss these girls when we are not together. Happily we get a chance to be together for Labor Day weekend. The best part is we get a whole week together in January for a trip to FLORIDA!!! Can't wait!!

Tricia :)

Trip to the Zoo

2008-06-19T10:39:00.010-04:00

We had this fun day after Mariah's little party day! It was a great time and Mariah loved all the animals. I will spare you all the animal pictures but you can enjoy us enjoying the day!

With Grandma O. checking out the lemurs

Look, Grandma found a wandering
monkey...cutest one I have ever seen!

With Daddy seeing the Elephants

With Mommy feeding the goats

Waiting for the camel ride

Yes....I am on a camel...Mariah loved it...me, not so much!

So, we had a great time. There are many more pictures but these were the highlights of the day! Needless to say, I am zoo-ed out for a little while!

Tricia :)

Mariah's Birthday Party

2008-06-19T10:21:00.008-04:00

Yes, I know, that was over a month ago but I have just now gotten all the pictures from those who took them. So...pictures of the day!

Presents.....Yippee....Candyland!!

Had to play right away....after our bath

The cake...Mommy made it...it is a Candyland cake
Do you see the theme???

We are a little excited about the cake!

Blowing out the candles

(This was actually after the other one...we got dressed)

We actually had this party at my sister's place...combined with my brother-in-laws graduation party weekend. It was a great, short little party!

Tricia :)

Happy Father's Day

2008-06-15T08:12:00.002-04:00

To the father of my little girl:
You are a wonderful father. Mariah always wants to be with you and you always make time for her. You are such a great example to her of how to live for Christ and we are seeing that in how she prays at night and asks about God all the time. Thank you for all you do for us! You work hard every day to provide for us...even though you really do not like your job. You come home, tired, but so happy to see us and ready to play with Mariah. I appreciate you so much! Happy Father's Day!

To my husband:
I love you more than words can say. You are so supportive of me and loving that words can not really express how I feel. Thank you for standing by me this last year and a half of surgeries and recovery. Not once have you complained about helping when I was too tired. Not once have you said to get over it when I was having a hard time with healing. I am so thankful for you and all that you are. I appreciate you so much!

To the other daddies out there: Happy Father's Day! May you have a great day celebrating with the children who make it possible for you to have this day!

Tricia :)

The Swingset/Playground is DONE!!!

2008-06-09T19:50:00.016-04:00

This has been quite the 2 week process. Mariah got a swing set/playground from her grandparents and aunts and uncles for her birthday. Jeremy and I have been putting it together off and on for 2 weeks. We are SO GLAD it is DONE. Below is the process in full color photos...enjoy!

First step...the Slide. Jeremy had the joy of doing that
alone because I had not made it home yet!

Step two....the rock wall/ladder for the side...this one I helped with!

Steps three-twelve...this thing you see above..basically the frame.

Getting closer...walls are up!

Mariah was a really good helper!

TaDa....finished product!

Mariah showing off the main section

The swings

The slide...and Mariah trying it out!

The picnic bench and potential sandbox...no sand for now

Mariah enjoying the swings

All in all, this was fun. Jeremy does not want to do this again....EVER! But Mariah is going to enjoy it for a long time so we are happy it is up.

Tricia :)

National Candy Month-June

2008-06-01T08:00:00.004-04:00

It is a new month and therefore time to celebrate a new holiday. I hope you all enjoyed your eggs and all that went along with celebrating them last month.

As most of you who truly know me know, I have a major love for CANDY!!! What better holiday to celebrate then National Candy Month. This now gives me the excuse to eat as much as I want this month. So, celebrate your candy, whatever your fav (mine being anything gummy), and enjoy this most joyous holiday with friends!!

Have a great month!

Tricia :)

Update: Yellow gummy bears are out of the celebration...don't ask, just comply!!

Men CAN go to Tea Parties

2008-05-27T17:38:00.004-04:00

Update on the tea party scene.....Daddy got in on the fun! So all you daddy's or soon-to-be daddy's out there....you are man enough to go to a tea party. My husband is so awesome!

Tricia :)

Tea Time!!

2008-05-27T13:43:00.009-04:00

Mariah and I had a tea party today. She got a Barbie tea set from my grandmother this past weekend and we had a great time with it today. So if you are ever in town, their is setting for 4... so come on over for tea!

Tricia :)

Sipping the wonderful tea (juice)

Smiles for the camera!

More cream, Mommy?

Fabulous desserts...donuts and cake!

Dinner Nap

2008-05-22T21:38:00.003-04:00

We caught Mariah sleeping during her dinner the other day. I guess we had a long day and didn't get our nap....definitely! As you can see, dinner was peanut butter and honey sandwich....with a spoon. Our little one eats....differently then most. But we love her all the more for it. I am so happy to be her mom!

Three years have gone by so fast and a lot has happened since her birth but I feel I have grown because of all of it.

Thank you, God for all you have given me. Help me to be thankful everyday and to trust you when it seems things are out of control.

Tricia :)

Little Black Dress

2008-05-17T22:02:00.002-04:00

Today is my birthday and I got myself a little black dress. I have not bought myself a dress since....I have no idea!!!

I just have to say, I feel so pretty in this dress. Is that wrong to feel that way? Is that selfish? I have had quite the year and a half and have not felt "myself" for awhile. When I put on the dress, with all the accessories of course, and see the look on my husbands face....well, it kind of wipes away all the bad feelings from this last year and a half. I hope I am not sounding selfish and "all about me" like but I feel like a million dollars in that dress.

Do you ever just have those human times when you feel "unlovely, not pretty?" Times when you wish things were different. I don't need people to come tell me I am pretty, I just sometimes feel not myself. Is this making sense?

I was talking to Jeremy tonight about all this. I told him that all of you (meaning anyone who sees me) see just me...with a little bit of a eyelid droop. I see double vision half the time and the drooping eyelid that makes it hard to see. I know to all of you I am me. But when I look out into the world I see an imperfect view and so sometimes I feel like that is who I am...an unperfect, not pretty view. I know all these things are just stupid and not justifiable but I am human. The reality is that God made me the way He did and that is enough. I am so thankful for what I have experienced this past year and a half because it has changed me in so many ways. Those feelings of "imperfection" are human and are there because of our sinful nature. But God wants to perfect us to be like Him in all areas. So I guess I need to look to Him when I feel "not pretty."

I share these things with you not to get pity, not to have someone tell me anything...just to share. This blog, from my point of view, is a place to come and share my feelings openly without being "told how to feel" if that makes sense.

I welcome your comments on my thoughts but please bare in mind I am not looking for your opinion on how to feel. So if I do not agree with you...don't get upset, just realize that I am only sharing my heart. I may not agree with you and you may not agree with me.

Thanks for listening. I can't wait to wear my little black dress and feel like the beautiful wife and person my husband deserves!

Go out and wear your little black dress...or whatever makes you feel pretty (or handsome) and then remember to thank God for making you the way He did....imperfections and all!!

Happy Birthday My Little Girl

2008-05-16T07:58:00.001-04:00

Today you turned 3. I set this post to show up right when you entered the world three years ago...7:58 am, May 16, 2005. I will never forget how I felt when they pulled you out (you were a c-section) and showed you to me. You were a perfect baby...I am your mother so that makes me a bit biased (ask what that means later)...but you were so beautiful.

Your daddy and I are so happy we get to celebrate all our birthdays together. Daddy's was yesterday, your's today, and mine tomorrow. What fun getting to have a big party, all together!! We love you so much and can't wait to see what new things you learn this year.

You learned so much this year. You can count to 10, in English and Spanish. You know all your letters and love to sing the alphabet song. You are learning to use the potty like Mommy and Daddy. So much more that I don't have room to name it all. We are so proud of you!

I am so happy that God let me be your Mommy. I am really excited that you pray with me before bed each night and actually pray yourself. I can't wait for the day that you understand and ask Jesus to save you from your sins. That will be the best day ever!!!

I love you my little baby. Don't grow us too fast!

Mommy :)

New Family Member...I'm an Aunt!

2008-05-15T20:57:00.006-04:00

My nephew, Gabriel, was born a week ago. Mariah is so excited about her new cousin. She got to hold him for the first time today and was SOOOO loving it. She is quite serious about "her baby" and talks about him constantly.

Of course I am loving being an aunt too. Can't wait to be holding my own baby again. Just have to get through this next surgery and then hopefully we can try to add to our little family.

My "baby" will be 3 tomorrow. I can not believe how fast it has gone. I remember when she was Gabriel's size. Now she is running around, talking up a storm, and making me smile every day. Wouldn't change a thing!!

Tricia :)

Tag....you are it!!

2008-05-06T18:41:00.008-04:00

If you are reading this....you have been tagged! Better answer the questions!!

What I was doing 10 yrs ago: Wednesday, May 6, 1998, 6:44 pm: I was most likely studing for finals or helping out at AWANA for the church.

Five things on my to do list for today: 1. Finish Laundry. 2. Clean the house since my family is coming this weekend. 3. Get a few grocery items for the weekend. 4. Go to music team practice. 5. Get Mariah in bed before too late!

Things I would do if I were a billionaire: Pay off all our debt, buy a house, get a puppy, help our church, go on missions trips to help others....

Three of my bad habits: Being lazy when things need to get done, drinking far to much soda, getting upset to easy

Five places I have lived: Jamestown, NY - Haddon Heights, NJ - Durban, South Africa - Duryea, PA - Dickson City, PA

Five jobs I have had: McDonald's - Secretary for a Gastroenterologist - Secretary for a Contractor - Secretary for a Church Planter - Tupperware Consultant

I am thankful.....

2008-05-05T22:20:00.003-04:00

I saw this on a friends blog (Ruth Stiles) and just thought it was worthy of repeat on mine.

I AM THANKFUL:

*FOR THE WIFE
WHO SAYS IT'S HOT DOGS TONIGHT,
BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME,
AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.

*FOR THE HUSBAND
WHO IS ON THE SOFA
BEING A COUCH POTATO,
BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME
AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.

*FOR THE TEENAGER
WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES
BECAUSE IT MEANS SHE IS AT HOME,
NOT ON THE STREETS.

*FOR THE TAXES I PAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM EMPLOYED .

*FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
BEEN SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.

*FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.

*FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE

*FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING,
WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING,
AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME.

*FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING
I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT
BECAUSE IT MEANS
WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH..

*FOR THE PARKING SPOT
I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING
AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION.

*FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM WARM.

*FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH
WHO SINGS OFF KEY! BECAUSE IT MEANS
I CAN HEAR.

*FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.

*FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES
AT THE END OF THE DAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN
CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD.

*FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF
IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM ALIVE.

Great News!!

2008-05-05T20:51:00.007-04:00

Most people would not say that having surgery is good news but for me it means the end of a long road! I am scheduled to have my eyelids lifted on June 25. I can not wait!!!

Hopefully this surgery will be the last forever, or at least until the next baby (if I can't convince the doctors that I want natural childbirth). It has been a long year and a half but I know that God has gotten the glory and I have grown so much!

Thank you to everyone who has been praying and don't stop!! Hope you have a great week!

Tricia :)

P.S. If you are a bit confused as to why all the surgery, go here

Mariah having fun!

2008-05-04T19:23:00.005-04:00

Here are some pics of Mariah and our neighbor boy Cameron. She loves playing with him. Plus they share something in common, their birthdays are the same day, just one year apart!

Having a good time!

Who can get the ball first?

Blowing bubbles!

New Birthday Du

2008-05-02T19:31:00.005-04:00

So I decided that I would get my haircut with some of my birthday money! What do you think? Jeremy is ok with it so that is good. He would love my hair to be long I think but this is SO MUCH easier to do in the morning. Well, just thought I would share my birthday fun with all of you!

Have a great weekend!

Tricia :)

National Egg Month-May

2008-05-01T09:15:00.003-04:00

As I promised, we will be celebrating a fun holiday each month. This month is National Egg Month! I pledge to eat eggs, have fun with eggs, be the egg all month! Join me in this quest!!

(Incidentally, this is all in fun!) However if you have any fun ideas for eggs this month, let me know!! I have an idea already...petition for them to be cheaper!!! Anyone with me??

Have a super week!

Tricia :)

Ladies Day Out

2008-04-27T15:33:00.005-04:00

This past Thursday I went with some of the ladies from my church to Lancaster to see the Sight and Sound production "Daniel." It was soooooo good!! After the show we had a great time shopping. If you haven't been to see Daniel yet, GO!! It is well worth it!

All of us in front of Sight and Sound

The ladies standing by the Amish buggy

The ladies is front of the beautiful trees that you see all over Lancaster

Canal Museum

2008-04-20T19:11:00.007-04:00

We also went to the Canal Museum that is right in the same building with the Crayola Factory. More fun pics below!!

It was a long day but we had a good time. All of us will sleep well tonight!

Tricia :)

Crayola Factory

2008-04-20T19:02:00.011-04:00

We went to the Crayola Factory in Easton, PA today! Fun times!!! Although little Miss Mariah was not the happiest person all day we still had fun. My sister Danielle and her husband Doug came along. We spent the weekend with them and this was a fun way to end it. These are just a few of the fun times!!

Tricia :)

Reflecting back

2008-04-13T21:40:00.005-04:00

I feel like reflecting. I am right now as I write this listening to a song that my wonderful husband used to play for me when we were dating. I say used to because he has not played the piano in a very long time. The song is "To Take....To Hold" by Yanni. I have probably listened to it about 6 times since I first put it in tonight. It reminds me of when I first fell in love with him.

We were in high school. We would sneak off to the church auditorium (I went to a Christian school held in a church building). He would play it for me until we got caught; a few times our music teacher would "pretend" she didn't see us and let us stay. I would just watch him play and imagine spending forever with him. I may have been 17 but I knew we would be together forever. I don't know how I knew....I just did!

I remember our first "date." I was having a Christmas party at my house after the school Christmas concert. I had invited all of my friends including my current boyfriend (who ironically was named Jeremy too). I realized that night that I no longer wanted to be dating this other Jeremy for many reasons, one of which was he wanted to marry me and have "relations" before even talking to my parents or me about it. Praise God that ended!!! Anyway, back to the party. So I dumped the bum and invited Jeremy (the good one) to come instead. My best friends at the time were Erin and Tammi (Erin still is). They thought it was a great idea to invite him but later got kind of "annoyed" that I had. I pretty much ignored them all evening.

We had our first kiss that night too. We were running around in the snow outside. I had stolen his hat (flirting of course) and he was chasing me. We landed in the snow bank and it happened...the first kiss of many! I will never forget that night!

So many wonderful things have happened since that first night. I will go into more detail maybe in later blogs. I love Jeremy Rexford Knapp with every ounce of my being! I can't wait to grow old together and tell our grand kids all about our lives.

Jeremy....if I asked you....would you marry me again? I want to share forever with you! I want to be there when you hurt. I want to be there when you have great times (like tomorrow when we get...you know....your new toy). I can't wait until we are old and have our house with the little porch and we can sit on it together and just talk. I love just talking with you. You are my soul mate, the love of my life! To take a quote from a card I gave you recently, "I don't always tell you right then and there when you're doing something that's making me fall in love with you all over again, but I want you to know that it happens all the time." I love you baby!

Tricia :)

Good day

2008-04-11T19:20:00.003-04:00

I had a great day! It started out with Mariah and I going to the monthly Mom's Group we go to. Had a great time...me listening to a great speaker and socializing...Mariah playing with all her buds.

Then we went shopping for fun and ended up getting party stuff and cake mix to make a "We love Daddy" fun night. Mariah helped make and decorate the cake....it tasted great.

I got a call from my doctor's office (regular doc) and the eco I had on Monday came back normal. God is good!! The sleeping/sedative meds the doctor gave me so I can sleep are working and the heart palpitations are not really bothering me much now.

So many great things to be happy about and most of all....to give God all the credit for! I am so thankful for days like these where I can give God thanks and also be able to look back on them on the not so good days!!

Have a super weekend!!!!

Tricia :)

Today

2008-04-10T11:03:00.006-04:00

Today is a new day. Today is a day that the Lord has made. Today the sun is shining. Today it is supposed to be 61 degrees. Today I love my husband. Today I love my daughter. Today, more than anything, I love my God. Today I want new eyes. Today I am making Italian beef stew. Today I need to give Mariah a bath. Today I will make blueberry muffins for Mom's Group. Today I choose to be content.

I can only live for today. Tomorrow is a different day and I will have to just wait until then to deal with what comes. Today I will live, to the best of my ability, to please the Lord and just be content.

Today

Overwhelmed....

2008-04-09T14:45:00.004-04:00

Do you ever feel just overwhelmed by everything going on in life? You know that God is in control and don't doubt that at all. Somehow everything just seems to pile on all at once and you really just feel like crying.

That is me today! I know God has a plan for all the things He is allowing to come into my life I just feel like it is a huge weight. I know part of my feelings are I had to have an eco-cardiagram on Monday due to the fact that I have had heart palpitations since my brain surgery in January 2007. I am sure all is fine but it has gotten worse lately so my doctor wanted to make sure everything is ok. Anyway, if you think about me, can you say a prayer.

I am not sure why it is so hard to just lean on the Lord in these times but it is. The truth is in my head my heart just can't hear it right now. Depression?? I don't think so. Blues??? Maybe a little. Anyway, just be praying.

Thanks and have a super rest of the week!

Tricia :)

Being a pastor's kid

2008-04-06T21:02:00.003-04:00

All you pastor's kids out there (and everyone else really) have to read this. I have been praying for a special family and I got connected to this blog through them. It is worth a read for sure!!! The name of the article is "What you might not know about your pastor's kids" by Rick Lawrenson.

Tricia :)

Happy Anniversary

2008-04-04T21:55:00.003-04:00

Sunday Jeremy and I have been married 6 years. We went out to celebrate tonight and had a great, quiet meal just the two of us. I am so happy!!

I just want to tell Jeremy how much I love him so the rest of you can just read and enjoy!

Jeremy,
You are the love of my life. You have been so much more then the man I married, you are my best friend. I know everyone says these things all the time but I truly mean them. No matter what we have gone through, you have been there. This last year has been the most challenging for us with all my surgery and recovery but you never stopped being supportive. Even when I got really "hard to listen too" at times you just kept being there. You are a real example to me of how to trust God even when things are hard. Even when we are "scraping the bottom of the barrel" financially (which is most of the time) you never stop trying to think positive.

You are a real gift to me and Mariah. Speaking of that....you are a super father. Mariah adores you and can't stop talking about you when you are at work all day. She wants to be with you all the time and even told me and grandma the other day she is going to marry you! That speaks volumes about how well you treat her, and me!

I just wanted you to know that on this day and every day I LOVE YOU!!

Love, Me

Spring....where are you?

2008-04-03T20:00:00.003-04:00

Seems I was wrong about the whole spring-being-here-soon thing. It is COLD outside and they actually called for sleet and possible SNOW tonight here in PA. Oh well, guess I will be moving down south soon (I wish).

So, I have been bored today trying to just hang at home, safe from the nasty cold weather. I think I probably should have been praying more. Or reading God's word more. Somehow even when I am bored I forget to do that! What is up with that??? Got to get better.

I have however been praying for our family friend Tricia Lawrenson. She is right now in Duke hospital recovering from a double lung transplant that she has been waiting for a long time. I am in awe of this little family. Her little girl, Gwyneth Rose, was born just a few weeks ago premature and doing great. God is so good and I see evidence of that in their lives. Her husband Nate is a real inspiration to be on how to have faith in the tough times. Check out there site here for more detailed information.

Well, I have nothing else really to speak of. If I think of more I will get back on and blog away. Have a super night!

Tricia :)

Hellooooooo!!!!

2008-04-03T18:48:00.004-04:00

Ok, a little bit disturbed! Where is everyone? Why are we not participating in the wonderful monthly holiday fun?!?!?

I need (want) your feedback, your suggestions, ANYTHING!!!!

Ok, just a friendly beg session. You can go back to your regularly scheduled lives.

Tricia :)

Update on Dad

2008-03-31T22:41:00.003-04:00

Dad is doing well after surgery. He was up walking that night and went home Tuesday morning. Thanks for all of you who were praying. God is good all the time!!!

(Photo is from last year July on our family vacation to Canada)

Tricia :)

Straw Hat Month-April

2008-03-31T16:47:00.008-04:00

I am pregnant!

APRIL FOOLS!!! Had to get that out of the way!!

Ok, this month is Straw Hat Month! Thats right all you farmers wives...we celebrate you this month! Everyone don your straw hat and sing a little diddy. I don't have a straw hat but I will need to get one for such a fabulous holiday event.

Have a great month!!

Tricia :)

National Frozen Food Month-March

2008-03-29T16:35:00.006-04:00

Did you know that this is National Frozen Food Month. I have decided that the best way to celebrate this fabulous month is to cook only frozen food from here on out (3 more days). So, join me in this quest to make this a well celebrated holiday across the country!

Am I bored you ask? Maybe. Either way, I will be posting my favorite holiday for each month from here on out. If you want to place your vote and help me choose, go here. Otherwise look forward to some exciting and fun times to come! Have a super weekend.

Tricia :)

New Glasses!

2008-03-27T15:28:00.004-04:00

It has been a little while since I posted. I am so happy to announce that I have my new glasses!!! This means that the double vision is on its way out the door. The glasses help my eyes to process single vision with prisms. And even more exciting....I CAN DRIVE!!! I have been out every day since I got them (Tuesday). Thanks to all of you who have prayed for me and don't stop!!

So, I think, maybe, that spring is on it's way. It has been consistently 40ish degrees here in PA so I see it on the way. I can't wait to have Mariah out in the yard and to take her to the local park!

Well, just wanted to fill you in! Please be praying for my dad, Paul as he is right now in surgery for a herniated disc in his back. Thanks again!

Tricia :)

Bragging Time

2008-03-20T21:27:00.004-04:00

Ok, I know that all moms are proud of their children. It is just the way things are and always will be. But my little 2 year old girl has to be a genius or something. The above picture of "Daddy" was drawn totally by her, on her own, no help! It is a very good picture for a 2 year old...you have to admit that!!!

I am so thankful for the little girl God has given to us. She teaches me something almost every day! If nothing else, she makes me very thankful to my parents for all they did for us. I know that this is totally a mom thing....but....she is so smart. She can count to 5 in Spanish, she knows her entire alphabet and recognizes the letters all over, she can count to 10 (English). The list goes on!!

I know I am bragging and to those who have kids your children are just as smart in your eyes. Please don't take this as I think she is smarter than everyone else. She is just my daughter and I am so proud of her!

Thanks for listening to me brag! Have a great weekend and a wonderful Easter!

Tricia :)

To My Little Girl

2008-03-18T15:56:00.003-04:00

I just wanted you to know how much I love you. I am so proud to be your Mommy. I watch you every day as you play and am so in awe of how smart you are. Figuring things out for yourself and learning new things all the time.

You will be 3 in a little over a month. It seems like just yesterday that we brought you home and "tried" to feed you for the first times, tried to figure out how to do everything right. I have discovered that you teach me more than I teach you. I hope I am a better person because God gave you to us.

I want you to know that your Daddy and I love God very much and we want you to come to love Him too. God died for you, saving you from a very bad forever. We are praying every day that you will accept His free gift to you and come to know Him like we do. We are also praying that you will one day marry a man of God and we pray for him too. I know boys are just friends right now but some day that may change. Don't ever forget that we love you and want to talk to you about anything that is on your mind. Please come to us!

I just was thinking about you and wanted to right down my thoughts so you could some day read them and know how I was feeling on this day. I love you with all my heart, Mariah. Be a good girl!

Love, Mommy :)

GREAT Day!!!

2008-03-17T18:12:00.004-04:00

I had a wonderful day today! Jeremy and I traveled to Philadelphia for my eye doctor's appointment. Long ride but so worth it!

We met with the doctor who did my eye muscle surgery in November. He came to the conclusion that it is now time for prisms for my glasses. This means that I will no longer have to see double!! AND I get to drive again!!!!! SO HAPPY ABOUT THAT!!!

I have to say that all my worrying and fusing was useless because God showed Himself in some good news today. God is good, all the time, no matter the circumstances. I need to remember that when I am struggling, not just when I get good news. I hope I can try to be better at that from here on out! Keep me in check, PLEASE, so I can do what God wants me to do in all things.

Thanks for all your prayers on my behalf today. I am so thankful for my friends! Your prayers are such a blessing and mean more than you will ever know.

Have a great week. Maybe I will come visit you now that I CAN DRIVE AGAIN!!!!

Tricia :) :)

Enough whining!!

2008-03-15T21:17:00.004-04:00

Ok, so the last few days have been a whine fest for me. That ends here!!

I need to apologize for going on like my life was over. My life is most certainly not over, just a few "bumps" along the way (thanks Ruth). I know that the Lord allows things to come into our life to help us to grow and to help draw us to Himself. I know that is what I have been struggling with this week but it is what it is. Thank you to all of you who prayed for me. I still wish things were different but I am thankful that God chose me for this time. He wants me to go through this, for whatever reason, and so that will just have to be enough for now.

I am reminded of Job and all he went through. He lost EVERYTHING (not just some sight) and he was still able to give God all the glory. That is faith!! I am going to struggle for that in my life, all the while knowing that it is just that, a struggle. We are in a spiritual battle everyday, trying to make the right decisions while we "fight the good fight." Well I am determined to try harder!! I know there will be more struggles and disappointments but that is not an excuse to get down.

Thanks, again, for listening! Let me know where I can be praying for you. It always helps us to be praying for other people.

Tricia :)

Feeling Numb

2008-03-15T13:13:00.004-04:00

I feel a bit numb. I wish that I could come to grips with my feelings lately. I want to just be ok with where God has me right now but every day I have a new "reason" to just be....down.

Do you ever have something planned and you are super excited and then all of a sudden everything is totally changed? I feel like that has been the story of my life lately. I don't want anyone to write me wondering what is wrong. You need to know that this blog is a place for me to come an unload my mind and heart and then try to get over it. I am not saying I don't want advice and prayer. I am saying I just need times to rant without fear of anyone thinking I am going nuts. Sorry if that hurts any feelings. That is NOT my goal. I just wanted you to know what I am thinking and feeling right now.

Anyway, I guess the right thing to do is just get over myself and try to be positive. It is getting increasingly more difficult to do this lately but I will do my best to try. Thanks for listening again (of course you do have the choice to ignore my blog so thanks for reading!).

Tricia